As I was listening to the kLove station broadcasting over my computer “encouraging moments” often interchange with the music and on this morning the following words came; when speaking to others, out of love or anger, “think” about how they will make the person feel…will you build them up or cause them to fall? will you plant a seed of hope or sow a sorrow?
Everyone has a different story, a different background, different circumstances. How are we to decide what is “right” or “wrong?” How can we deflate an excited spirit in a brief second with one word, but say paragraphs of good things and still not break the in-confident individual?
Sometimes I need to “re-think” my thoughts…am I saying things to build others up or put them down? Lately in my readings the topics are on being obscure. Obscure in actions and details of “one-upping” Maybe a detail isn’t necessary to share, maybe it’s a detail that would make another feel down about their circumstances. I do not need to say things to brag…I need to find my confidence in Christ and seek his approval alone. And not look to the approval of man. So often our excitement comes from being better than others, but perhaps I need to find my happiness in seeking after Jesus.
Is your “mess” reflecting your “message”?
I will not fret about the changes that will most likely occur in March. (repeat 10 times over) Today I basically taught all my classes by myself because my usual co-teacher was observing new teachers in the other classes. The teacher who usually teaches the reading classes was with me and wasn’t much help, however, the kids listened to me and overall it wasn’t too bad of a day. 🙂
|Totally worth it!|
Since new circumstances are not going to be discussed with me until I’m in the midst, I have begun to sense with things aren’t right or seemingly relaxed. My co-teacher is “interviewing” teachers for either her position or a different school’s. I have started prying because as much as they don’t think it’s my business; it is. Today I discovered that the last two weeks of February I have morning classes, then March 5th begins the new semester. I have decided my questioning is worth it.
This past weekend was spent volunteering at the orphanage. It’s tough to see. Even though it’s hanging out with the kids and playing with them, you can tell their frustrated with the lack of being able to communicate fully what they are thinking. They barely speak English. Games are limited here so we looked at pictures, braided our hair, twirled the little ones around, and tried to play catch indoors..a lot of laughing and hand gestures! The weather has been awful frigid so I am really hoping with spring and summer around the corner we can play games outside and have a better connection with the kids. Maybe they are just getting used to new faces. I can be quiet myself around new faces especially when I don’t know what to say…
Today I went to a cute little 김밥 (pronounced “kim-bap”) shop…it was around the main street, down some stairs; a place that only locals would know about. We ordered 불고기 김밥, 장금김밥, and 장금 국. (meat and vegetable kim bap, and vegetable noodle-soup) The couple that owns it is deaf; my friend and I had to write down what we wanted. My friend is Korean, I met her in yoga class. She has two kids and her husband works all the time. She is so sweet and keeps telling me she doesn’t want me to leave in September. (aww) I am helping her with her English when we are in yoga or out to lunch, she taught herself some by using Rosetta Stone. I also learned the word for take-out. 포장해주세요. One of these days I WILL order take out— and because the couple is deaf, you text your order in…amazing!
Tomorrow my little brother turns 17…I feel old! 🙂 This month’s Happy Birthday’s go to the new babies of two beautiful friends, the cutest 4 year old I could ever be “Aunt Megan” to, a fabulous friend who I have known since second grade, and another terrific friend from college who was the best roommate ever! Wish I could be there to celebrate with you all!!!
Yesterday was my 5th month in SK! WHOHOO! I’m in a good routine now…I’ve met some amazing friends, I’m blessed with an incredible support system, and I adore my kids. I think I’m becoming a more confident teacher. This week helped confirm that as I taught with a different teacher- she wasn’t used to my style of teaching- so I could direct her to translate what needed to be. But other than that- I had total control of the class and my students were awesome!! It was so refreshing to be able to do what I wanted to do for a change. My kids are seriously the best. They melt my heart and make me smile. And they know when I’m serious and when I’m funny and they listen! Ah! So exciting! (Of course this is the majority of the time…and not everyday! haha)
A couple days ago I tried….a Korean aerobics class. Oh wow, talk about intense. ALLL the dances were crazy “pop-y” and CHOREOGRAPHED! Insane. By the end, I think I got the hang of it.
Over skype my mother and I laughed about “free wi-fis” at BK, me being a tough tutor, and smiling on a lovely prayer card from the church. Blessed.
Monday morning brought quarter-sized gently falling flakes and a private yoga class with my friend complete with a tofu-seaweed salad.
Even though the “ah-ha” moments of “I’m in Korea” are seldom nowadays, I can’t get over the sweet moments of the people that have weaved themselves into my quaint life here. I don’t want to loose the awe of being in a unique place. I’m living my dream of living and working in another country and sometimes I take myself by surprise…I’m a planner so things don’t just happen overnight, but the final step of getting on the plane or in my car to drive is done blindly. No turning back. Only a bird’s eye view in the plane or my foot on the pedal and my eyes in the rear view mirror. The future is unknown still, all I can say is I’ll be in South Korea another 7 months. I have goals of teaching in South America for a period of time, but this year has shown me that underneath it all, I really do want to fall in love and be close to my family. It’s a tug of war, but right now I am fully committed to enjoying my adventures where I’m located!
I love this devotion by Max Lucado entitled:
The Voice of Adventure:
|random billboard on my run “Fun Fun”|
There is a rawness and wonder to life. Pursue it. Hunt for it. Sell out to get it. Don’t listen to the whines of those who have settles for a second rate life and want you to do the same so they won’t feel guilty. Your goal is not to live long- it’s to live.
Jesus says the options are clear On one side is the voice of safety. You can build a fire in the hearth, stay inside, and stay warm and dry and safe. ..
Or you can hear the voice of adventure- God’s Adventure. Instead of building a fire in your hearth, build a fire in your heart. Follow God’s impulses. Adopt a child. Move overseas. Teach the class. Change careers. Run for office. Make a difference. Sure it isn’t safe, but what is?
~He Still Moves Stones.
Amazing. Absolutely Amazing. An Adventure all your own. Being a friend to someone you never thought possible. Being a new mother. Moving back home to make life better for your family. Taking risks financially, emotionally, physically. All for the glory of God. A personalized Adventure all your own. Cling to it, seeking it for all it’s worth and yearning for more challenges. Grasping His love as you tread through sinking sand. This is what He wants, and as we grip harder as the sand spins faster- the deeper we fall in love, the more we understand the simplicity and complexity of His Saving Grace.
As the day nears Valentine’s Day; I must admit I am no longer jealous of the couples dining awkwardly amidst the pink red and white… but facing the day with all the love for my family and friends, and spoiling myself with homemade chocolate (from the lady at Cafe Muse), wine (on sale at Lotte Mart- so yes I bought two bottles!), and pasta. Seriously a girl can’t ask for a special day for all this…every day should be worth spoiling for. This year I get to share it with two fabulous friends whom I have met in SK. I’m truly a lucky girl.
(Though I do miss my mother’s heart-shaped cherry cheesecake…she did promise to make me some upon my return so I’ll just add that to the ever growing list of foods I crave and will have to indulge in when I return, fantastic!)
|Lovely Saturday Afternoon: Reading at a Cafe|
|Mint Mochas and Americano’s|
|Street Corner…the Day it mixed Snow and Rain…|
|Valentine’s Day Chocolate from my student ❤|
|Because a girl can only eat so much rice and mandu….|
xo Happy Valentine’s Day! xo